This Girl’s Life

Keeping my promise with my previous post, I’ll start by talking about the job I held for a little over year as an personal living assistant to a visually-impaired girl in the area. Originally I started out as her paper-formatting gal, but our friendship grew and she needed an assistant.

My weekly duties involved taking her to the gym, driving her to the grocery store (where I had to read her the ingredients on the back of each box, the weekly specials and etc), cleaning her apartment, occasional outfit coordination, accompanying her to dinner and describing the food to her, and as I came to find out, general companionship.

Shamefully I can’t remember her name for the life of me, though I believe it was Rebecca. Rebecca was wildly accomplished given her handicap- she was attaining her Doctorate’s degree in psychology and sociology, managed to the be the Residential Assistant for the dorm she lived in (free housing!), was engaged to a successful engineer who lived in the Chicago area and was well-known among students and staff.

The first few times I worked with Rebecca I found her to be terribly gruff and bossy and extremely sarcastic. All things that are obviously acceptable given the daily issues she faced. After about a year of my working with her I was dusting her collection of unicorns and merry-go-rounds with Smallville  on TV in the background. It happened to one of those scenes where there was no talking… all action and acting… in silence. Smallville happened to be Rebecca’s favorite show and as she put it, she couldn’t have been happier to have me there. I found myself describing the opening scene for her as without that information, she would have been lost for the entire show.

It hit me at that moment, while I was delicately wrapping the unicorns and merry-go-rounds into newspaper and boxes for her, how much those of us with sight do take for granted. We never discussed her sight impairment; I have no idea when it happened or how it happened. She never wore sunglasses, unless we were outside and her bright blue eyes managed to look at me on occasion which was both fantastic and slightly eerie.

Rebecca was great at schmoozing with adults and kids, getting what she needed done, writing a well-crafted paper and she turned out to be a friend. We did lose touch shortly after I graduated, but last I knew she was in Chicago, with her fiance, planning the upcoming wedding.

This job is one I look back on that actually had some purpose and some meaning during my college years and if nothing else taught me to be more open, less judgmental and remember how fortunate I am.

I don’t usually post links because I know 99% of my readers (a whole 16 or 17 of you, I think) won’t take the time to click on them, but this article stood out today. A twin? In your stomach? Just hanging out, nine years into your life and your little twin is inside you.

Girl’s twin is found inside her stomach

Coming Soon: It occurred to me that sometimes I get so caught up in my corporate, 8-5 world that I forget what I did before I was an office slave. I had some pretty freakin’ awesome jobs and they all left their own imprint on my life. As per Byron, I feel that as I approach the quarterlife mark, the things I really want to remember don’t come up as often I would like them to. So maybe writing about my past jobs will help out my hippocampus and you’ll get yet another glimpse into who Nora is.

I don’t often write about my younger brother, though it occurs to me I should. He’s brilliant at the age of almost 20; recently applied for and earned the position of editing his university’s newspaper as a sophomore. (That’s a big deal!) He has made his body a political shrine with five tattoos and counting, all of them making a positive political statement in their own way. He insists that we recycle anything and everything that can be reduced and reused.

My generation (I’m five years older than CR) is slowly catching on to the idea of Going Green. His is adapting it at a rapid pace. He’s got me thinking as of late about my personal decisions in the most random things:

• Dog Waste Bags. I foolishly use the plastic bags at the grocery store when I go because they are useful for many other things… reusable lunch bags, taking donations to GoodWill, carrying around my extra pairs of shoes when I travel, etc etc. I also use them to pick up Jack’s waste. It’s always struck me as an odd thing, humans picking up after animals, but what’s even weirder is that we use plastic, nonbiodegradable bags to pick up said waste. Makes zero sense. I did some research during my lunch hour today and found that there’s a plethora of biodegradable bags out there for dog waste, some at Petco and PetSmart. I will definitely be purchasing those soon.
• Water Bottles. CR informed me that there’s a great Swiss Army (I think) alumnium reusable bottle available at Whole Foods. I’m going this weekend to snag mine.
• Back to the plastic bag thing. I’m going to give in and purchase some bags from Trader Joe’s. And I’m taking the bags I already have to a recycling bin at one of the other grocery stores in the area.
• As part of my new fitness routine, I realized that some of the stores I frequent the most aren’t all that far away. So… I’ll commence to walking. It can only impact me in a good way: spend less on gas, purchase fewer groceries since I’ll have to lug them home, and exercise. Good all around.

My brain is running a mile a minute trying to think of additional ways to go green. What have you done that’s green lately?

There are days where my Sicilian attitude takes over… 99.9% of the time it’s a good thing. Examples:

Work is stressful. What’s Nora gonna do about it?

She’s going to leave work at work. She’ll work from 8am-5pm, sometimes 7am-6pm, but other than that, she’s leaving it there. She’ll ask Boss (aka Dad) to respect that unless there are times of crises or she needs personal guidance, but otherwise, no work talk post-office hours.

The gym membership isn’t getting its usual workout. What’s Nora gonna do about it?

I am joining forces with a friend starting on Wednesday for a new friend-to-friend program of encouraged healthful eating and increased exercise. My mind is already buzzin’ thinking of new exercise plans, better ways to shop at the grocery store, ideas for snacks and dinners, even those that will work with my crazy food allergies. Quite frankly, I am fed up… return of post-tonsil Nora shall return. I’ve got the bug and it’s going to happen.

In the work-stress and graduate school haze, important things are falling by the wayside. What’s Nora gonna do about it?

I’ve made a list of what needs to be done. Jack to the vet. Nora to the dentist. Three months of photos printed and inserted into albums. A list of phone calls that need to be made. Chopping and dying my hair. Back to doing things for Nora (not exclusively, just most of the time). I’ll tackle things one at at time and get them done, enjoying the fulfillment of checking off each task as I go.

Tired of keeping up false pretenses and putting up with stupidity. What’s Nora gonna do about it?

I’m going to start telling it like it is, in moderation. Why’s Nora hitting the bar scene less? I’ll tell the truth… tired of meeting ridiculous drunk people, smelling like a bar, wasting empty calories. Why’s Nora sleeping in late? She’s freakin’ tired. Why am I not hanging out with so-and-so? Maybe I just don’t like them. Don’t need the drama, the guilt. The reason I do the things I do is because they make me happy. My resolution this year was “cut the shi!t,” and I need to get back to that. It starts now.

How I survive my yearly cold/sinus infection, courtesy of my incessant allergies:

• The New Kleenex with Vicks. They are amazing.
• Gilmore Girls and Sex and the City seasons on DVD. They are perfect to sleep through or sit and stare at as they are bound to make you smile at some point.
• My stack of Netflix DVDs. Becoming Jane was my afternoon company yesterday.
• Slim Fast for meals and peppermint tea to calm the coughing.
• ManMate… he actually has been fetching me ice cold water for two days.
• Jack: he loves a cuddle buddy and secretly enjoys the fact that I’m home I believe since he nestles into my knees every time I settle on the couch or my bed.
• My pink blanket that I’ve had since I was a kid. It’s meant for a twin bed so I use it on the couch. It’s fleecy and soft wool and brings a touch of comfort to the foggy sickness. (Jack likes this blanket too… I’ve caught him chewing on it a few tims.)
• Fudgsicles.
• Heavenly Alka Seltzer Liqui-Gels for day & night.
• SLEEP. SLEEP. And more sleep.

• Fake smile at other students in the class. Whisper their name and when they turn to look at you, have a fake smile ready to go. They are sure to laugh.
• Make guesses as to what time you will get out of class this evening. Winner gets a drink bought for them after the final.
• Draw on the very 80s, very awkardly posed people in the photos on the pages of your Operations & Project Management book. Things like mustaches, word bubbles, fake smiles and etc will do. Show to the friend who is closest to you. Bonus points if one of the persons in the photos is deemed to be a classmate.
• Count the number of times your professor has obvious errors in his powerpoint slides.
• Debate throwing the book at the girl behind you. Sure, you may not be paying 100% attention but her unnecessary “Uh-huhs,” “I agree,” “Yes, I noticed that when reading last night,” are seriously annoying.
• Marvel at how many times your handwriting can change in one night.
• Ask a few questions here and there because you really are listening but seriously, you could read the book on your own.
• Check your cell phone for text messages. If you don’t have one, text someone you know will respond.
• Conjure up an image of what you are going to be making for dinner when you get home.
• Highlight and star all important passages, page numbers and definitions for the copious amount of hours of self-study you have ahead of you before the final.

There is a very slight, tiny chance that I may have a date on Friday night. Saturday night out with the girls, our younger friend who is still in college and therefore much better about approaching guys fearlessly and without care, found a group of three guys who wound up hanging out with us for the rest of the night.

Guy #1: Very much looking like a model, tan, dressed well, blue eyes that you could get lost in.

Guy #2: Supposedly has a glass eye, at least according to his friends, and is also apparently in one of those “it’s complicated,” situations and a stellar vocabulary, despite his incessant drinking.

Guy #3: Tall. Green eyes. Stockbroker. Not a great dancer but impressive that he danced with us nonetheless. Potentially shy. And potentially my date on Friday night. No clue how the dialogue between us got started but when it did start it was flirty and he suggested that we go on a few dates. Naturally, still not trusting of all men, I laughed it off and kept on dancing. But he didn’t go away. At one point I turned around when he called my name only to find his face right in front of mine, at which point he kissed me, which was the first of many that evening. (I only saw Guy #3 drink one beer while we were around him, so not sure of his mental/alcohol-influenced state.)

Regardless of the outcome of Guy # 3: date or no date, once again the Dating Gods have reaffirmed my belief in having fun with a guy who will we assume is nice. For a few moments I felt like I was back in college, not really caring whether or not he calls or texts (honest! though he has texted), relishing the moment, enjoying the randomness of it all, the hand-holding through the crowds waiting to get a tequila shot, the casual tap on the knee at Dennys, all of it being oddly intimate yet anonymous at the same time.

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There is another glimmer on the horizon: he doesn’t have a nickname yet, but he’s a friend of a friend. I expressed my interest in getting to know him, she told him and apparently the interest is mutual. He’s younger than me, in the early stages of his graduate school, from a small town and a little bit country but intelligent, liberal and he has four sisters. He’s out of town for break right now but rumor has it that when he gets back we’ll be doing a group outing.

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Do you guys remember Seattle? I met him back in January while in NOLA? Well I’ll be seeing him again in July for the next conference we are both attending and truthfully I’m really looking forward to it. We text and email on a regular basis: we both have our lives in our individual towns but yet we manage to include each other.

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I think I like the glimmers better than the “matter-of-fact,”boys. It’s what makes summertime fun, interesting and most of all, never dull.

There are moments when I’m more aware of the fact that I’m an adult than usual: the monthly car payment I receive, having to make those stupid phone calls to straighten out the insurance company, reorganizing my 401(k) and having friends who are not only married… they are moving away.

I first met Sam-Sam my sophomore year in college (six years ago) during our “rush,” for one of the more popular service & social organizations on campus. If you asked me today how or why we bonded, I honestly couldn’t tell you but we started having lunch together a few times a week which quickly translated into girls’ nights out, study breaks in each others’ dorm rooms, and the general sharing of our lives.

She’s been there for me through boyfriends & break-ups, graduations & graduate admissions, all the while being loyal (she’s the one who gives my exes the fun nicknames I still use today…), supportive, up for a party or movie night, not afraid to tell it like it is and so much more.

Tomorrow she moves to North Carolina to join her husband (who is a Marine). For good. We partied yesterday to celebrate Cinco de Mayo, our friendship, her future and the ability to have fun. We refused to talk about her leaving, our past as friends, her future to avoid the tears and emotion. I can’t even talk about it now (Sam-Sam reads this blog). So with that, I leave you with a picture and the promise to myself and Sam-Sam that we won’t lose touch and that I’ll visit her sooner than later.

The girls I roomed with while in Vegas, dubbed the Fabulous Four for the weekend. The one to my left is the girl who was married in St. Thomas last year and who I’ve known for 17 years!

Not sure who snapped this picture, but it captures the essence of the many Patron shots that were purchased for us.

Below: The girls on our second to last night when we scored the Stretch Hummer Limo…for free!  

I attended a military-sponsored networking luncheon today where I was placed at a table with six other men. Topics of conversation included: my office building being haunted, adopting dogs and their subsequent demise after years of loyal friendship, using cooking oil as fuel for your car, and the alarm concept that our money is better in our food pantry in our house. Experts say that the money in our savings and checking accounts should be spent on canned and boxed food as it’s worth more, especially if the recession continues. Alarming thought. I think I’m on the verge of protesting something. Gas prices. Economy. “W.”

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Walking Jack after work tonight, Lily, the giant yellow lab that lives across the street, was out for her walk, and as usual greeted Jack with numerous loud barks. Lily’s owner, a short, very stout, very aggravated woman, started yelling at Lily again to “LEAVE IT! STOP BARKIN’! SHUT UP. SIT. STAY. DON’T MOVE.” I can’t help but wonder if Lily is asking Jack to have me rescue her as Lily’s “mom,” yells like this every time we see her outside. Breaks my heart. Don’t people know that animals and children sense your emotions? If you chill out, they’ll chill out.

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Following up with my positive reasons to move out and back in with the ‘rents…

Reason #2: ManMate hogs the bathroom, refuses to do the dishes and never refills the ice dispenser.
Reason #3: The people who live in 3B are still overly loud and they now have a puppy who barks, whines and scratches every time her moms (yes, moms) leave the house.